An Introduction
As my friends from work are joining my pipe loving friends here, it seems appropriate that I make an introduction so that we can all get along.
Work folks, meet the Pipemen. The pipemen are all great guys although perhaps a bit behind the times, pursuing a noble hobby and thoughtful way of living that died some decades ago. They've been reading here for a couple of years now as I made my monthly post about pipes and tobaccos.
I should perhaps mention though that not all pipemen are men. Women seem to be embracing our hobby these past few years, an unexpected and interesting development.
Pipemen, meet the people I work with. Very smart folks, almost all, in fact the finest Legislative staff in the nation according to the book Sine Die. The folks I work with have been reading a little daily newsletter that I put out the past two Legislative Sessions. That newsletter was called The Daily Ghetto.
When I first started working in Olympia, I, like so many others, rented an apartment with a couple of roommates. Let me tell you, that was a disaster. Those guys were slobs! Honestly, I still feel sorry for the poor gal who came in to clean from time to time.
Years passed and I got smart. I bought an Airstream and booted the roommates to the curb. My only trouble was that it was a Vintage Airstream, and it certainly didn't come with an instruction manual. Propane gas under pressure, electrical systems, and half insane old people as neighbors, a myriad of ways for me to accidentally kill myself. I think that I must have experienced them all. That is what The Daily Ghetto was, my daily accounts of my seemingly daily near death experiences, all at my own hand.
Time continued to pass though and I finally learned how to use everything, stopped almost killing myself on a regular basis. That, I am sorry to say, dried up my store of things for people to laugh at me about, resulting in the death of The Daily Ghetto.
I certainly can't stop writing though, Mrs. Bailey does not move to Olympia with me, and there are only so many rubber reception shrimp one can eat in any given year. That means I've got time on my hands in the evenings, time that must be filled by writing to my friends at work.
All of this results in the readers of The Daily Ghetto being invited here where I'll write of many more things than just my potential death in an explosion and fireball. Perhaps there will be some of that as well though; one never can know just how much trouble I will get myself into.
This post follows a copy of the announcement I distributed to the people I work with, perhaps you can join me in welcoming them into this place so filled with smoke from our burning latakia.
Please remember my pipe-smoking friends that there is a proper way for a gentleman to read the Mayor's Vice. That is in jacket and tie, relaxing with a pipe in front of a roaring fire.
As for the ladies, I believe that you will get the utmost out of reading The Mayors Vice in nice stiletto heels and fine quality lingerie. Please though ladies, for my own scientific research and the betterment of humanity, email me a concise description of the undergarments and heels you prefer to wear while reading here.
Gentlemen, kindly skip that step.
December 21, 2009
It is with great sadness that Evil Ghetto Wife and I must report the death of that Legislative Icon, The Daily Ghetto.
The Daily Ghetto did have a good run through the years but alas I finally figured out how everything worked inside of the Ghetto and in doing so stopped having near death experiences to entertain you and yours.
Please though, while you may weep for the loss of The Daily Ghetto, do not fear for the future of the Washington State Legislature, for I shall continue to provide you with the highlight of your day under the Washington State Capitol Dome.
Cruel nature demands that the old must die to make way for the new and today I am pleased to announce the birth of a new home of literature, a new location for the art of commentary upon our shared lives on and around our beloved Capitol Campus.
Cry for The Daily Ghetto but join me in celebrating the birth of:
The Mayor's Vice.
At this new location, under this new name, I, your humble correspondent will continue to provide you with the very finest commentary to be found deep in the cavern-like basement of the Legislative Building.
I pledge to you, my faithless readership, that you will not find better topics for your daily conversation, more enlightening entertainment, or greater opportunity for unadulterated joy anywhere else under the grey Olympia sky.
Please visit The Mayor's Vice each and every day, thinking positive thoughts about me, your special, perhaps mad friend while doing so. You might just as well, for if you did not, you would surely have nothing else to do.
You may find The Mayor's Vice, updated daily, and with so much good stuff in the archives at:
May 2010 be your very best year ever, and please, allow me to assure you that by reading The Mayor's Vice each day, it certainly will be.
Cameron M. Bailey